| Breaking up is hard to do |
[01 Aug 2008|09:12am] |
Two years we have been together and that's the longest I've been in a committed relationship. We had our fair share of ups and downs and we always seemed to pull a miracle to make it to another day. However, the past few months things have been extremely tough. I can't even get a word in without being cut off. Frustrated, I find myself feeling most of the time. And to think I was head over heels at the beginning and can't wait to get my hands on him. The honeymoon phase at the beginning of every relationship is so much fun and refreshing. It's unfortunate that love couldn't keep us together, no matter how hard we tried and compromised. I've learned that sometimes its best just to let it go. So with that said, I'm letting this one go because it's time...
( and my heart is preoccupied with a new love... )
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| Woman sits on boyfriend's toilet for 2 years |
[14 Mar 2008|09:11am] |
There are a lot of interesting headlines lately but this one really tops it for me yesterday...
Girlfriend was physically stuck to the seat — her skin had grown around it
updated 3:05 p.m. ET, Wed., March. 12, 2008
NESS CITY, Kan. - Deputies said a woman in western Kansas sat on her boyfriend's toilet for two years, and they're investigating whether she was mistreated.
Ness County Sheriff Bryan Whipple said a man called his office last month to report that something was wrong with his girlfriend.
Whipple said it appeared the 35-year-old Ness City woman’s skin had grown around the seat. She initially refused emergency medical services but was finally convinced by responders and her boyfriend that she needed to be checked out at a hospital.
“We pried the toilet seat off with a pry bar and the seat went with her to the hospital,” Whipple said. “The hospital removed it.”
( as I finish the story, I started to think of all the possibilities... )
Me: why did the bf let her sit on there for so long?
him: i dunno i would probably beat you up if you didnt get off the toilet
Me: yea, tough love some may call it
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| What I can give |
[28 Jan 2008|11:50pm] |
 take a penny, leave a penny.
does the same not apply to us?
i give, you take.
you give, i take.
isn't that how love is supposed to work?
how can you give it all,
when your soul is running on empty?
how can you take it in,
when your heart is exhausted?
if i could turn back time,
i would let your heart heal.
if only i could turn back time,
i would gave up my fight
a little sooner.
but i can't undo the past,
the mistakes that were not meant to be made.
i can't give you
the perfect relationship
but i can give you all that i am.
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| On cloud nine |
[29 Apr 2006|11:46am] |
@ brookside gardens, MD
As you can tell from the picture, my hair current status is jetblack. YIKES! The last time I've seen my "natural" color was probably right after I crawled out of my mommy's ******. Ever since I discovered the power of peroxide, it was hard going back to my roots! I'm like a fat kid in a candy store, so many choices, so little time! "So why did I dye my hair black" you asked? Well, I wanted the real me to shine, I wanted people to see the innocent me. HA! JK! I was just bored and wanted to try something new and different. And wow, it sure was different! For the first hour, I didn't recognize myself. Like the boytoys in my life, my hair color was exciting while it lasted. It has been 20 days and 4 hours, and I'm really for a change!
( bring it on )
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| Don't fart in bed! |
[22 Dec 2005|01:15pm] |
If this story doesn't make you cry from laughing so hard, let me know and we'll send someone right over to check your pulse.
This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years.
The only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.
Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out.
The years went by and he continued to rip them out! Then one Christmas morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her.
She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.
Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom.The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good.
About twenty minutes later, her! husband came downstairs in his bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter.
He said, "Darling, you were right. All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you."
"What do you mean?" asked his wife.
"Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened. But by the grace of God, Vaseline and these two fingers, I think I got most of them back in.
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| '05 wish list |
[28 Nov 2005|10:17pm] |
A lot of people have been asking me what I want for xmas. Oddly enough, for the very first time, I have nothing on my wish list this year. Nada. I have everything I need for a fullfilling and happy life - a loving family, wonderful friends, a semi-productive immune system and most importantly, 6 drawers of panties. No laundry for a year!!!! Seriously, what more do I want?
Well actually, I have a few minor things in mind. Duh, I am a girl. There's anyways something. My back could use the comfort of the soft leather seats of a SL55 or a set of "enhanced" rack. Better yet, I want what every girl wants this christmas:
( LV: a girl's other bestfriend when your boyfriend can't afford the bling )
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| 30-sec update |
[15 Jul 2005|09:21am] |
you know what's worse then getting a speeding ticket?
getting a speeding ticket for driving in the carpool lane by yourself while being late for work. not only do you get the ticket, the cop makes you sit there and wait for a good 30 minutes before handing over a $275 bill. happy happy joy joy. what kills me is the fact that there isn't even that much traffic in the first place.
don't feel sorry for me, feel sorry for the greedy people who got pulled over this morning on my way to work :)
30 second update: lifeisgreat. workisawesome. can't complain. dc next weekend and sunny cali4ya in august. can't wait for some r&r.
( guess what's outside my office window? )
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| I guess I've been wrong all these years |
[22 Apr 2005|09:31am] |
Size not an issue ... although Italy out in front, study finds
HONG KONG - Chinese men have no reason to feel inferior about the size of their penises, according to a Hong Kong study which showed local men measured up to others elsewhere in the world below the belt.
( Read more... )
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[20 Apr 2005|08:31pm] |
I sat in an anatomy class yesterday- just because I have a big thirst for knowledge. An hour and a half later, to my surprise, all my questions about men were answered- why they say the things they say, do the things they do, and act the way they act.
( it's a no brainer! har har har )
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[08 Apr 2005|11:51am] |
TGIF! A little forward I got from my boss this morning that cracked me up.
A co-worker got a pen stuck inside our printer. He started to try and remove the pen, but I told him we don't have time for that now, just put a note on the printer telling folks not to use it and then report it to the Help Desk. So he grabbed a piece of paper and scrawled on it. I left before he finished the note. About 20 minutes later, one of my techs came in laughing, saying he was just in the lobby, saw a piece of paper on a printer and went to investigate. Attached is what he found.
( Sometimes things don't always come out the way you want them to )
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| Life is good. Nothing to complain about. :) |
[29 Mar 2005|09:27pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 content |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Erasure- Send me an Angel |
] |
I was googling for some images to build my friend's website and came across a few pictures/animations that made my night.
( warning: rated xxx behind the cut )
I'm in the market for a new digital camera. My Canon S400 went dead on me a few months ago and it would cost be $150 to revitalize it. So that's a No-No. Anyone has any recommendations? I like most of my things small, so we'll start from there.
the contenders:
Canon SD 500
Sony CyberShot DSC-P200
HELP ME PLEASE. pretty please.
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| Bennifer started it all |
[03 Mar 2005|09:22pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 pessimistic |
] |
Is it so hard for couples to stay together anymore?
First, it was jen and brad.
now, it's denise and charlie.
"Actress Denise Richards has filed for divorce from actor Charlie Sheen, citing irreconcilable differences. Married since June 2002, the couple have a one-year-old daughter and are expecting their second child in three months. Richards is seeking spousal support and full legal and physical custody of the children; she has asked Sheen be granted visitation rights. Richards has retained powerhouse attorney Laura Wasser, known for representing Hollywood’s most powerful men."
and katie and chris.
"One of Hollywood's sweetest young couples, KATIE HOLMES and CHRIS KLEIN, has called off their engagement, according to Us Weekly magazine. A spokesperson for Holmes tells the publication that they decided to go their separate ways about two weeks ago, but "want to stay friends and will continue that part of their relationship." The popular actors announced their engagement in December of 2003, after nearly five years of dating. Holmes is perhaps best known by audiences for her role as Joey Potter on TV's "Dawson's Creek." Klein gained recognition with movies like "American Pie' and 'Election.'
I'm so sad. I don't give much crap about hollywood love stories since it seems like they don't truly understand the meaning and concept of true love. But somehow naive me thought of all the hollywood couples, these 3 would have made it. As god be my witness, if Will and Jada ever break up, then that's it, i'm gonna come out of the closet. Or if Jessica Alba tries to rape me. Whichever comes first.
Since we're on the topic of hollywood. If you could have a one-night stand with any of the A-listers in hollywood, who would it be?
( I've been creaming in my pants for him since I was 10 )
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[30 Jan 2005|09:22pm] |
| [ |
music |
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boulevard of broken dreams- green day |
] |
i miss.
my tan. my dumb blond hair. afternoon naps. the beanies and animals. the hewhoreslut. my best friends. being in love. waking up next to someone you care about. rocco. 4 am study breaks. california. vegas. miami beach. surprises. restful nights. watercolor. daylight saving. my grandmother. pre-puberty flawless skin. pinky. my 20 yr old metabolism. the simple life.
I'm not a big green day fan but recently this song had me singing along...
I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's home to me and I walk alone
I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
and I'm the only one and I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk a...
I'm not sad per se... just that I feel something's missing but I can't exactly put my finger on what it is. *sigh*
Last week, our office moved from the 4th floor to the 9th. One of the movers asked me what important stuff I do to get such a nice office. My reply, "I eat and sleep =P" I love my new office. Finally, a window! I don't feel like a prisoner anymore. The only thing I don't like about the new desk is that the surface area had decreased by 50%. *sigh* I guess no more afternoon "naps" for me. And another bad thing is that my back is to the door.. so hhmmm... no slacking for me!
welcome to my office space.
My office needs some life to it. You're more than welcome to drop in and say hi. or send me flowers to:
Satan
666 Hot in Herre Avenue
Onlythegooddieyoung, HELL 90210
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| ManRay |
[17 Sep 2004|11:05am] |
I went to a gay club last night. It was interesting to say the least. The thought of being surrounded by good looking gay men excites me as much as having sex with a straight guy. Most of the guys there had a smaller waist than me. That, of course, was hard for my ego to swallow.
"You know, they show gay porns here." Nice but really not interested. Being a straight female that I am, guy-on-guy action doesn't appeal to me. As i was saying that, something on TV caught my eyes, a guy on top of another guy, going at it- heterosexual style. "How the freak is that possible?!!!! But he doesn't have a ..." "OOOHhhhhhh..OOOohhhhh" dOh! Curious Vicky ain't curious no mo'! They were also showing guys playing basketball in their birthday suit with their thing swinging all over the place.. and naked men wrestling each on the mat. Ouch! talk about floor burns...
We were dancing the night away when this half naked black dude started to grind the life out of me, pressing his ripped body against me. holy shiet. It was definitely HOT.. and I'm not just talking about his body and his ass! I'm sure most guys there wished they were in my shoes. It's truly a shame that he was gay. Normally, I wouldn't let a stranger do what he did to me, but since I wasn't his cup of tea, it wasn't a big deal. The privileges of being a gay guy i suppose. For a brief moment i thought I'd accomplished my life long goal of turning a gay guy straight. oh well... maybe next time.
( why i am such a shallow person you ask? )
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| the art of peeling |
[06 Aug 2004|11:47am] |
Fuck! there's no such thing!
The upside of having a tan, well at least for me, is looking half a pound lighter and toner. YAY! However, the downside, of course, is the peeling. Like Austin Powers' villain Goldmember, I, too, have a collection of dried flakes stored in a special tin container. The only difference is that his flakes are pasty white and mine are dirty blackish brown. I'm saving them for the winter so I can have tan skin all year round!
Today is day #4. My chest is 60% peeled, considering I don't have much surface area to start off with. Both my shoulders and back are racing to the finish line as well. I would show you a picture but then it's almost lunch time and I don't want you to lose your appetite. Yes, it's THAT disgusting! Was being burnt and not being able to lay on my back and stomach and shedding like a fucking rotten snake worth it? Freak yea! After a few days of looking like a lobster, I get to enjoy my "tan" for a day before I look like a victim of Psoriasis. It's a shame what girls will do for beauty. Well, it's a shame what I'll do for beauty. My mom always lectures me on how asian girls should be pasty white because it looks more pretty and classy, blah blah blah. Beauty is definitely in the eyes of the beholder.
Celebrating ms. ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) four_eleven's early-26th birthday in Mee Ah Mee
Miami was fun. yes, I went to Miami again. 3 times within the past 5 months. And to think I don't even have a boytoy down there. 5 girls, 4 days, 4 nights, 1 beach- yup, a lot of a$$, a lot of titties, a lot of farting, and a whole lot of burping. With that much estrogens, how could we be less lady-like?
my gansta biatches.
( censored pictures behind the cut )
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